I feel stuck like this photo.

I don't know why I feel this way latey but I just know this isn't normal. I feel like that I have been trying to find an answer, yet I am stuck instead of finding it. Hm, it is tiring for me to keep asking God for giving me some answer.
Why cannot I get an answer to my questions so easily? Why cannot I just go for it without asking too many questions? Is this time that I just need to decide and act instead of waiting for an answer? Is this time that people usually say a wilderness experience? How can the wilderness experience be defined? Am I like people of Israel in wilderness for 40years?
I might be... since I have found myself complaining so much lately. I am just sick of myself that I keep falling into unbelief again and again inspite of how much God has shown me His great mercy and love. It should be time for me to trust Him fully but I am still worried about so many things. When I finally realized that I just need some paitence and trust God in a certain issue, I thought that my faith has been raised up pretty much and didn't expect that I will fall again with unbelief in another issue. That is why I think that I am just like people of Israel in wilderness, which is written in the book of Numbers. They had kept complaining as saying that there is no water to drink, no food to eat, and no meat to eat after one by one God had fulfilled their all needs. When I read this story of Israel in the book of Numbers, I was thinking that it was just too tidious of how Israel responded back to Him. It seemed that they had never learned their lessons, which was not so difficult to learn. Why did they keep forgetting of How God provided all their needs and complaining as thinking that God brought them out of Egypt slavery to harm them. What an unbelievable response!!
They responded badlly back toward God's goodness & Love for them.

Great! This is just what I have been doing... I have been acting like this people whom I judged as hopeless people. Oh, no... I am hopeless.
Hm, One thing different compare to the Israelites is that I have Holy Spirit in me, who interceds. I will ask Him to remind me of what Jesus has done on the cross, so that I could look at Him for Hope that is coming and I could have boldness to lean on my good Father God as if I am pure before Him. Yes! I have this hope and boldness, which helps me not to beat myself too much but get over from self hatress. I know that God wants me to love myself because He loves me soooo much.

Hope that I can get through this time of wilderness well that I could learn something out of it.

Welcome to Charityseoland!

Yes!
People have their own lands so many times. So, we can totally misunderstand eacth other easily if (perhaps when) we don't really know which kind of land they are actually living in.
Unless we do communicate with each other again and again, we will not know what they think and why they are acting like that. That is why good communication is so important to work or live together welll in a society. But it seems that people are just simply not the same in their communication becasue they all live in a different land.
That is why we often misunderstand of what their intention or heart is behind of what they are doing. I found myself being totally lost from time to time just because I don't recognize the land they are living in.
So, I am hoping that this blog can be a good start for myself to share with my friends a little bit of which kind of land I am in. My land can be moving around slowly as time goes. Hoping that it can be changed into good and better though. I like to hope because there will be no real life without hope.